1. Describe what you are looking for other than sex.
2. Don't use pictures of your junk or even shirtless photos.
3. Don't brag. Describe your qualities tactfully.
4. Do some homework and find her online footprints.
5. Be positive. Cynicism does not attract women.
6. Use a catchy title in your profile or ad.
7. Post multiple ads with different titles and content.
8. Have something interesting to say.
9. Insist on a photo from her.
10. Get her on the phone as soon as possible.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Friday, February 3, 2012
How to find girls on Facebook.
A lot of people have been asking me about a good way to pickup girls using social networks like Facebook,Twitter, Myspace and so on. If you want to know how to find girls on Facebook then I have great news for you. There's not much to it besides using the search function and your imagination. I'm going to assume that you have already dated or decided not to date the girls who are already your friends on Facebook. The easiest place to start is with...
Girls you already knew in the past but have lost touch with.
Think about all of the girls that you used to think were hot and don't talk to anymore. Make a list and search for them now. If you find a few shoot them a message. Don't request to be friends. It is too soon, makes you look too open and takes away from the mystery. Being mysterious is good. Don't spend a lot of time looking for an old crush. If her name doesn't show up when you search just move on to the next girl on your list.
If they happen to be logged in when you find them don't hesitate to send an instant message. They will be happy to hear from someone from their past unless they have some reason not to like you, have a serious relationship, or any other number of reasons. They may or not be available so don't invest a lot of time chasing one specific girl.
If they don't respond send them a "Hi blast from the past. What are you up to these days?" or something of that nature which fits your character. Short and sweet. Don't invest a lot of time into it. Think of a good hello message and send it to all of the girls on your list. You will usually find girls online on Facebook early in the morning and after work between about 5:30 and 7:30. Also after 9:00 pm but any time of day or night holds the possibility of finding girls on Facebook so do it at your leisure. Most of the time you will be sending an offline message anyways.
How to meet girls online on Facebook.
A simple search will usually be all that it takes since just about everyone has a Facebook account. It doesn't hurt that they often show their relationship status too. By the way, as I stated long ago the easy way to find a girls Facebook page is to simply use her email address in the search field. Even if you don't know her name you might find her page. This is great when you are using Craigslist to meet women.
When you try to find girls on Facebook it requires a few more considerations in my book than using Craigslist or POF. With online personals you don't have anything permanent that is tied to anything of importance. With something like Facebook your account probably has friends and relatives attached to it so the implications of cross communication between the girls you find on Facebook and your other contacts open up more potential problems. This is especially true if you are planning to hook up rather than do any serious dating.
Girls you already knew in the past but have lost touch with.
Think about all of the girls that you used to think were hot and don't talk to anymore. Make a list and search for them now. If you find a few shoot them a message. Don't request to be friends. It is too soon, makes you look too open and takes away from the mystery. Being mysterious is good. Don't spend a lot of time looking for an old crush. If her name doesn't show up when you search just move on to the next girl on your list.
If they happen to be logged in when you find them don't hesitate to send an instant message. They will be happy to hear from someone from their past unless they have some reason not to like you, have a serious relationship, or any other number of reasons. They may or not be available so don't invest a lot of time chasing one specific girl.
If they don't respond send them a "Hi blast from the past. What are you up to these days?" or something of that nature which fits your character. Short and sweet. Don't invest a lot of time into it. Think of a good hello message and send it to all of the girls on your list. You will usually find girls online on Facebook early in the morning and after work between about 5:30 and 7:30. Also after 9:00 pm but any time of day or night holds the possibility of finding girls on Facebook so do it at your leisure. Most of the time you will be sending an offline message anyways.
How to meet girls online on Facebook.
A simple search will usually be all that it takes since just about everyone has a Facebook account. It doesn't hurt that they often show their relationship status too. By the way, as I stated long ago the easy way to find a girls Facebook page is to simply use her email address in the search field. Even if you don't know her name you might find her page. This is great when you are using Craigslist to meet women.
When you try to find girls on Facebook it requires a few more considerations in my book than using Craigslist or POF. With online personals you don't have anything permanent that is tied to anything of importance. With something like Facebook your account probably has friends and relatives attached to it so the implications of cross communication between the girls you find on Facebook and your other contacts open up more potential problems. This is especially true if you are planning to hook up rather than do any serious dating.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Offline dating
Since I started this blog I have primarily focused on meeting women through the internet. While this is one of the easiest ways to hook up I don't want to ignore the obvious which is meeting women in everyday situations. There is plenty of material available for how to pick up girls in bars and clubs if you search for it. You will have to spend a lot of time sorting out the junk from the good stuff but it is out there. What I see a lack of is quality information on how to meet women under circumstances that do not require some formal type of social gathering.
Since I just posted a couple of tips on another blog I figure that the least I can do is reference it here so that none of my readers miss out. Think of these as tools which you can use to help meet women in public places. Not a complete method but some ideas that will pay off if you employ them in the right situation. I will update this page as I think of them.
Good gimmicks for attracting women in the supermarket.
1. Go through the cute cashiers line with all of the ingredients for sushi or something else that is popular but few people know how to prepare.
She will almost definitely make a comment about what you are making. If you know how to cook this is great. If not then you should definitely learn. Having a woman over for a meal that you prepared is an aphrodisiac in itself. You will have to find a way to continue the conversation when she has a spare minute or you run into her again but from now on you will be known as the "guy who makes sushi". This is good.
2. If you can't find a cute girl at the check stand, find one on the sales floor. Ask her where some exotic ingredient is located because you need it for some gourmet dish that you are preparing. Choose something popular that most people love. Watch her eyes dilate as she thinks about the dish that you describe.
I do this a lot using shrimp scampi or a desert containing chocolate.
3. Make a funny observation. "Why does every store always put the tuna on the bottom shelf?"
Okay I know that the last one isn't that funny but it can start a conversation. See what you can come up with.
Since I just posted a couple of tips on another blog I figure that the least I can do is reference it here so that none of my readers miss out. Think of these as tools which you can use to help meet women in public places. Not a complete method but some ideas that will pay off if you employ them in the right situation. I will update this page as I think of them.
Good gimmicks for attracting women in the supermarket.
1. Go through the cute cashiers line with all of the ingredients for sushi or something else that is popular but few people know how to prepare.
She will almost definitely make a comment about what you are making. If you know how to cook this is great. If not then you should definitely learn. Having a woman over for a meal that you prepared is an aphrodisiac in itself. You will have to find a way to continue the conversation when she has a spare minute or you run into her again but from now on you will be known as the "guy who makes sushi". This is good.
2. If you can't find a cute girl at the check stand, find one on the sales floor. Ask her where some exotic ingredient is located because you need it for some gourmet dish that you are preparing. Choose something popular that most people love. Watch her eyes dilate as she thinks about the dish that you describe.
I do this a lot using shrimp scampi or a desert containing chocolate.
3. Make a funny observation. "Why does every store always put the tuna on the bottom shelf?"
Okay I know that the last one isn't that funny but it can start a conversation. See what you can come up with.
Monday, January 9, 2012
What's in a name?
As always I am browsing the online dating forums and looking for dating tips to pass on to you guys. Of course I usually try out anything new before suggesting it as a way to boost your online dating success. In the case of statistics however it makes sense to utilize the work of others who might have already done the numbers for us. In this post I want to address the topic of establishing good profile names.
Take a look at this post on the nzherald. If you've thought about being discreet with your adventures, why not start with picking a "nickname" for online dating? Based on the article it sounds like something that we don't have much control over-our given name-is a factor when it comes to being selected by women searching for "companionship" on the internet. Sure if you end up in a long term situation your choice to use an alias for your online dating name might come in to question but so what? All in the name of safety is something that most women understand. Personally I can think of at least ten different women that I met online last year who didn't even give me their true first name until we met in person. While any dishonesty or omission of truth arouses suspicion I really believe that using an alias as your dating profile name is an understandable choice.
Of course we can't all be "Rod" "Brad" or "Lindsay" On that last one, what an uncommon name for a guy. I'm tempted to try it just to see what happens. Kerry and Cameron have me a little surprised too but remember that we are talking about what women like. Our opinions often differ. Another idea of course would be to choose a funny online dating name for your POF or OKCupid account but I'll go into that later. Come to think of it, I'm gonna get started on a separate post about great taglines for online dating soon. I would rank that equally as important as what you choose to sign your communications with.
Samuel, Bevan and Jesse... You might want to think about going by something different, at least in the beginning.
Take a look at this post on the nzherald. If you've thought about being discreet with your adventures, why not start with picking a "nickname" for online dating? Based on the article it sounds like something that we don't have much control over-our given name-is a factor when it comes to being selected by women searching for "companionship" on the internet. Sure if you end up in a long term situation your choice to use an alias for your online dating name might come in to question but so what? All in the name of safety is something that most women understand. Personally I can think of at least ten different women that I met online last year who didn't even give me their true first name until we met in person. While any dishonesty or omission of truth arouses suspicion I really believe that using an alias as your dating profile name is an understandable choice.
Of course we can't all be "Rod" "Brad" or "Lindsay" On that last one, what an uncommon name for a guy. I'm tempted to try it just to see what happens. Kerry and Cameron have me a little surprised too but remember that we are talking about what women like. Our opinions often differ. Another idea of course would be to choose a funny online dating name for your POF or OKCupid account but I'll go into that later. Come to think of it, I'm gonna get started on a separate post about great taglines for online dating soon. I would rank that equally as important as what you choose to sign your communications with.
Samuel, Bevan and Jesse... You might want to think about going by something different, at least in the beginning.
Friday, January 6, 2012
POF Meetme update
I can't take credit for this as a friend of mine found it on some internet marketing forum. I would give credit if I knew where but he isn't around at the moment so anyways here it is.
There are a few caveats for this trick. First of all you will probably get a lot of unattractive and overweight women replying to you. That comes with the territory. You will have to take some time to find the ones that you are interested in. On the flip side, you'll see what it's like to be a female on POF getting a barrage of messages from people that you are not interested in. And if you happen to like BBWs or just want to keep your nail from getting rusty, this should provide many opportunities for practice. Secondly, don't set the macro to run to some ridiculously high number. Try a hundred or so your first day and see what happens. If you do too many too fast it looks like POF may limit the number of Meetmes that get sent. Do this at your own risk. It is entirely possible that they may eventually decide to delete profiles or block IP addresses based on this so if you have a proxy, use it.
Unlike Craigslist you can't just put an ad up on POF and expect a lot of women to contact you. That is unless you have a great photo and let's face it, if you are a pretty boy then you probably don't need my help. So, when it comes to POF and OKCupid, both of which I highly recommend, you will have to do some work.
Contacting a lot of women takes time and effort so writing something specifically personalised to one woman just isn't practical. Add to that the fact that you can expect somewhere between 5-10% response rate. This simply makes meeting women with online personals the traditional way too difficult.
Using the POF Meetme feature is way easier and faster than writing a message. Just point and click. This was working very well for a while although it seems that the people at POF have caught on to a little method that guys were using to automate the system. If you aren't familar with macros, look them up and then proceed with the following.
Download the Firefox browser if you don't already use it. Next you will need a program called iMacros for Firefox. Click on the Meetme section and hit record on iMacro. Click Yes on the meet her option. Loop the macro and hit play.
Good luck and have fun.
There are a few caveats for this trick. First of all you will probably get a lot of unattractive and overweight women replying to you. That comes with the territory. You will have to take some time to find the ones that you are interested in. On the flip side, you'll see what it's like to be a female on POF getting a barrage of messages from people that you are not interested in. And if you happen to like BBWs or just want to keep your nail from getting rusty, this should provide many opportunities for practice. Secondly, don't set the macro to run to some ridiculously high number. Try a hundred or so your first day and see what happens. If you do too many too fast it looks like POF may limit the number of Meetmes that get sent. Do this at your own risk. It is entirely possible that they may eventually decide to delete profiles or block IP addresses based on this so if you have a proxy, use it.
Unlike Craigslist you can't just put an ad up on POF and expect a lot of women to contact you. That is unless you have a great photo and let's face it, if you are a pretty boy then you probably don't need my help. So, when it comes to POF and OKCupid, both of which I highly recommend, you will have to do some work.
Contacting a lot of women takes time and effort so writing something specifically personalised to one woman just isn't practical. Add to that the fact that you can expect somewhere between 5-10% response rate. This simply makes meeting women with online personals the traditional way too difficult.
Using the POF Meetme feature is way easier and faster than writing a message. Just point and click. This was working very well for a while although it seems that the people at POF have caught on to a little method that guys were using to automate the system. If you aren't familar with macros, look them up and then proceed with the following.
Download the Firefox browser if you don't already use it. Next you will need a program called iMacros for Firefox. Click on the Meetme section and hit record on iMacro. Click Yes on the meet her option. Loop the macro and hit play.
Good luck and have fun.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Create your own survey
After my "Lose weight while you date" adventure I thought that maybe I should tone the idea down a bit while still aiming for a way to encourage participation from those who read my ads. Now getting someone interested in using sex to stay in shape borders on the casual encounter category which is something that I want to stay away from for a few reasons. The foremost being that there are a lot of guys posing as women in that section and also because I am not looking specifically for random "hook up sex."
Because I did get a lot of replies however I decided that something similar might be a good idea. Currently I have ads posted that incorporate a survey into the post. The titles are similar to "Answer these correctly and win a dream date" to "Female dating opinion wanted" and everything in between. These are not the exact titles that I used but you get the idea. Now in the body of the post I have asked several questions that are of interest to me. Topics include preferences in music, food, entertainment, etc. I ask a few key questions that aren't too invasive but will give me an idea of what type of girl I am dealing with like "What do you think about public displays of affection?" or "Are you here looking for a relationship, casual dating, or whatever happens?" Things that allow her to tell as much as she likes.
I always request a photo at the end of the post since this amount of time invested makes it likely to be ok with her. Right now I have a few of these running so I can't give them away word for word but use your imagination. There is plenty of room for creativity here.
Because I did get a lot of replies however I decided that something similar might be a good idea. Currently I have ads posted that incorporate a survey into the post. The titles are similar to "Answer these correctly and win a dream date" to "Female dating opinion wanted" and everything in between. These are not the exact titles that I used but you get the idea. Now in the body of the post I have asked several questions that are of interest to me. Topics include preferences in music, food, entertainment, etc. I ask a few key questions that aren't too invasive but will give me an idea of what type of girl I am dealing with like "What do you think about public displays of affection?" or "Are you here looking for a relationship, casual dating, or whatever happens?" Things that allow her to tell as much as she likes.
I always request a photo at the end of the post since this amount of time invested makes it likely to be ok with her. Right now I have a few of these running so I can't give them away word for word but use your imagination. There is plenty of room for creativity here.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Dating Tips First Date
Online dating articles can have some strange things to say about what you should expect from the first date. I've read so much about first date advice for men that I could write an encyclopedia on the subject. Well it feels like that anyways. Now why would I, the guy who has way more women than he can juggle at the moment need first date advice? To make a long story short I didn't. I've known how to handle a first date since high school. What I did need though was some dating advice for people who have been in a long term relationship and want to find a date. That was the dating advice that I was looking for. The first date advice was something that I read just because it was there... and it was entertaining to say the least. See? I told you that I'd make it a short answer.
So while I was looking for ways to meet more women, I had the benefit of reading a whole bunch of bad first date advice that came along with it. People who had watched way too many movies were telling me what to wear, how to avoid the wrong conversational topics and so on. At the time a lot of this dating advice might have had some relevance but that was before I started meeting women online.
So what's different about meeting women online as opposed to meeting women in everyday real life situations? Intent. That is the easiest answer that I can give you. Most people will tell you that you "Never know when you might meet that special someone..." Well I do! I'm going to meet special someones when I choose to. It's like a singles bar at my desktop and women who want to hookup are standing in line to meet guys who have a little bit of game.
I'm not going to write extensively about what to do on your first date but here are some easy to implement guidelines:
1. Don't think of it as a "date"
We are talking about women from Craigslist here. They want companionship and sex. Forget about touring the city or going horseback riding or whatever the hell it is people do on "dates". Go somewhere for a drink and some conversation.
2. Stay close to home.
What if she makes it clear that she wants to be alone with you? It happens. More than you might expect. Be prepared. The last thing you need is a 30 minute drive when she's in the mood.
3. Sit next to her if possible.
Staring across a table at someone is confrontational. If she acts funny about it at all just tell her that this is not an interview and you prefer side by side. If she puts up a lot of resistance you are already heading down the wrong path. Hopefully she's just strong willed but try to stay in charge without acting bossy. Besides, this will allow you to...
4. Touch her
Not in a creepy cop-a-feel way but casually. Start out with non invasive areas like her shoulder (the one closest to you) and her outer arm. Some of you are naturals at judging how far to go and when but if not be sure to respect her space but only as far as she wants you to. This can become a complex topic. Maybe I will do a separate post on this altogether.
5. Make her feel safe
Women like sex but they want to have it with someone who isn't going to hurt or stalk them. Tell her about how much you like animals or that you had a friend with a crazy stalker girlfriend. Don't tell her that your ex was stalking you. That could be scary for her. Communicate your "normalness". Once she trusts you it will be time to ramp up.
6. Escalate
Once you have had some casual conversation (an interesting one that is, none of the so-how-do-you-like-your-job? stuff) get closer to the point. Tell her about how you can judge a person by the way they kiss or does she want to see your (insert really interesting or unique object here) that you have at your place down the street. Give her a reason to be alone with you without making her feel sleazy.
Ok that's it for now. I'm leaving out a lot of details but this should get you started. If things don't seem to be going well and you figure it's time to bail, ask her if she wants to make out. Yes I am serious. Even if you screwed something up badly there is always a chance that she still wants to bang you. What would you have to lose at that point? Sometimes the answer will be "No" Anything other than that either means "Yes" or "Not yet".
So while I was looking for ways to meet more women, I had the benefit of reading a whole bunch of bad first date advice that came along with it. People who had watched way too many movies were telling me what to wear, how to avoid the wrong conversational topics and so on. At the time a lot of this dating advice might have had some relevance but that was before I started meeting women online.
So what's different about meeting women online as opposed to meeting women in everyday real life situations? Intent. That is the easiest answer that I can give you. Most people will tell you that you "Never know when you might meet that special someone..." Well I do! I'm going to meet special someones when I choose to. It's like a singles bar at my desktop and women who want to hookup are standing in line to meet guys who have a little bit of game.
I'm not going to write extensively about what to do on your first date but here are some easy to implement guidelines:
1. Don't think of it as a "date"
We are talking about women from Craigslist here. They want companionship and sex. Forget about touring the city or going horseback riding or whatever the hell it is people do on "dates". Go somewhere for a drink and some conversation.
2. Stay close to home.
What if she makes it clear that she wants to be alone with you? It happens. More than you might expect. Be prepared. The last thing you need is a 30 minute drive when she's in the mood.
3. Sit next to her if possible.
Staring across a table at someone is confrontational. If she acts funny about it at all just tell her that this is not an interview and you prefer side by side. If she puts up a lot of resistance you are already heading down the wrong path. Hopefully she's just strong willed but try to stay in charge without acting bossy. Besides, this will allow you to...
4. Touch her
Not in a creepy cop-a-feel way but casually. Start out with non invasive areas like her shoulder (the one closest to you) and her outer arm. Some of you are naturals at judging how far to go and when but if not be sure to respect her space but only as far as she wants you to. This can become a complex topic. Maybe I will do a separate post on this altogether.
5. Make her feel safe
Women like sex but they want to have it with someone who isn't going to hurt or stalk them. Tell her about how much you like animals or that you had a friend with a crazy stalker girlfriend. Don't tell her that your ex was stalking you. That could be scary for her. Communicate your "normalness". Once she trusts you it will be time to ramp up.
6. Escalate
Once you have had some casual conversation (an interesting one that is, none of the so-how-do-you-like-your-job? stuff) get closer to the point. Tell her about how you can judge a person by the way they kiss or does she want to see your (insert really interesting or unique object here) that you have at your place down the street. Give her a reason to be alone with you without making her feel sleazy.
Ok that's it for now. I'm leaving out a lot of details but this should get you started. If things don't seem to be going well and you figure it's time to bail, ask her if she wants to make out. Yes I am serious. Even if you screwed something up badly there is always a chance that she still wants to bang you. What would you have to lose at that point? Sometimes the answer will be "No" Anything other than that either means "Yes" or "Not yet".
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